Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Tuesday's Tantrum!!

I have been fighting a BIG mental vs. physical battle the last several weeks~it all started with this nagging lower leg pain that threw a giant monkey wrench in my running for about 4 weeks. Then finally when THAT irritating pain subsided I was able to run 20 miles in the Run for the Fallen, which my body really was not ready for. Now I have been experiencing some foot pain post Run for the Fallen -and since I play a Doctor on TV, I have gone ahead and diagnosed myself with fascia inflammation from overuse (running 20 miles when the previous 4 weeks my max run had been in the 7-8 mile category).

This morning I got up early to run on the treadmill while Lola slept and what was supposed to be 5 miles of speedwork turned into 3 miles of frustration. And not FAST frustration. I guess since my pace was not where I thought it should be I threw in the towel. I quit. I don't quit!! Why did I allow myself to quit today? Yes, it was hot. Yes, I was annoyed with my Garmin (trying to figure out how to use it for a TM run). Yes, I should remember that my training has not been on target. But I let my ego dictate this morning's run, not my logic. Stop it with the temper tantrum already!!

Since I started working out and running I have never had to deal with any kind of physical set back or injury and it has been really hard for me to accept these physical limitations. I have been on a road of constant improvement over the last 18 months so right now it's killing me to feel like I have been pushed back MONTHS in training. My confidence has been shaken and that is a very scary thing for me.
I have so much on the line right now and I don't want to feel like I have failed. I could easily take the pressure off myself by not expecting anything performance wise at these races on the schedule but then do I risk not pushing myself 110%??
This frustration has certainly been seen in my eating habits of late too! Pizza, ice cream, chips and Oreos. Oreos?? Are you kidding me? I don't EAT this kind of garbage. I have worked way to hard to start slipping back into old habits. I know, I know...it's all emotional eating and while it is important that I recognize that it is more important that I deal with the frustration instead of feeding it.

So I gave myself a good kick in the behind and got the train back on track yesterday. This clean eating gal is back and done being dirty. I restocked the house with all my favorite clean eating staples (eggs, oatmeal, quinoa, Greek yogurt, veggies, veggies, veggies). I am going back to weekly weigh-ins on Fridays to hold myself accountable.
I have a 5k race on Monday 9/6 and while I was hoping for a PR for this race, I guess I will just have to suck it up and just do my best and disregard any PR's for the time being.

I'm getting back to basics with my training and eating.
Check back on Friday for my progress report on week one.


Melissa Cunningham said...

OH!!!! hang in there girl!!!!!!!!!
maybe try some pool workouts to help you out????

hope you feel better asap!!!
now get back on that nutrition wagon!!!

Anonymous said...

Good for you for getting back on track. I too throw in the towel with exercise at times, and then I throw my eating out the window as well! I am def an all or nothing person and I'm going to take a guess that you are as well :)

I'll check back Friday to see how you're doing. Good luck!

Tangy said...

oh Jennifer!! That really stinks that you are having these issues so close to your busy racing schedule!! It is easy to get discouraged when you have an injury--I am nursing one myself but just let yourself heal and don't push too hard too soon so you can be back to 100% soon!! 110% isn't always a reality when you aren't in perfect form! It isn't worth making an injury worse. You are so superfit and I'm sure your body will be healed in no time! And it is a little relief to me to see that even you can have eating slip-ups--good for you for nipping that in the bud!! I know you have another PR in you this year--it'll come!!

Anonymous said...

Okay Doctor Jen -

I have no doubt that you will get it back on track. Just remember that you did not become the physical gem you are now overnight ... you have not fallen that far back (yes your progress forward has slowed but that had to happen. Your physical prowess has changed so far that eventually you had to reach a point where improvement would be more incremental.) You will get your nagging injury, your eating and your training back under control and you will gradually see improvement again. But have fun too - you usually do - it shows through in your posts.

I will continue to follow and admire your determined path. And share a laugh ... and recognize that not every day can be a best day but we can try to make every day the best we can.

Keep it up - you're doing great.