I got in my early morning training session and then I hit up the track with Hubby for his training session (that's another post all together!) and then we came home to prepare a healthy meal loaded with stuff from our home garden.
Right now we are sitting on a ton of peppers (remember this post) and tomatoes so dinner was going to be veggie rice with giant salads.
Hubby gets busy chopping up the peppers-fresh jalapeno and bell peppers-for the rice and I was tending to Lola. Then I hear him screaming for help and see him rush into the bathroom, to the bathroom sick with a towel in his hand.
My first thought, of course, is that he cut his hand or finger while chopping the peppers.
No. That was not it. Not even close...
Do you know what happens when you are cutting up jalapeno peppers and then touch your nether regions??
This is a picture of some FIREBALLS.
Let's just say that this is a very appropriate term for what we were dealing with.
Hubby is hurting, really hurting and I tell him to get in the shower and wash the effected area.
This provided no relief and he was literally begging me for help. I have never had FIREBALLS before so I did not know what to suggest. I know that I like to eat hot food and that sour cream or milk usually help but would milk products help with the Twig 'n Berries too?
I told him to "hang tight" and I'd go Google it.
I Googled "I touched a jalapeno pepper and then touched my penis. How do I stop the burning?" and I got a plethora of results. I was having quite an enjoyable time reading some of the situations and suggestions that popped up but I needed to tend to the problem at hand.
Suggestion #1: MILK
Now, Hubby agreed to let me blog about this but he insisted on NO PICTURES. I did bring my phone with me (great Instagram moment, right?) but he was pretty firm on his NO.
Lola is the only one in the house who drinks cow milk so we had a bit left of a quart sized container. Suboptimal for the situation at hand so I created a replenishing milk waterfall to try and neutralize the pepper oils smothering Jim and the Twins. Picture this, a grown man standing nude in the shower while I pour milk from a cup over his junk, into a "catch basin" below and then repeating this process over and over. All the while I am trying to keep Lola occupied elsewhere in the house, this was something she did not need to see! All the while, I am trying to control my laughter and not doing a very good job at it.
While the ice cold milk from the fridge provided some relief (he said it was a cold at the Atlantic ocean), he did not get much pain relief from the Milk Method. Hubby said enough and asked that we try something else.
Onto the next suggestion, which was Calamine lotion.
Suggestion #2: Calamine Lotion
We don't have any so I call his Mom, who lives next door. No answer, which means she is on the phone. NEXT. I was really looking forward to her calling me back...
After reading some more Google suggestions and tricks, I discovered that you need to give the Milk Method enough time to actually break down the capsicum and neutralize it.
I then had an idea.
My Suggestion #3: Greek Yogurt
Greek yogurt is thick and would cover more area than the milk waterfall method. By this point, the Hubby was up for anything so I slathered Admiral Winky and his two soldiers up with some plain Greek yogurt. He then set up camp in his office, spread out on the couch on a giant beach towel while I kept Lola busy. Now she is getting very curious as to what is going on!
Not much time had passed and Hubby cried Uncle on the Greek Yogurt method, calling this one a failure.
Suggestion #4: Rubbing Alcohol
So it was back into the shower to clean off the yogurt and then apply a generous amount of rubbing alcohol to the Unit. Finally, he got some relief from the burning. Within minutes, the pain was at a tolerable level.
He had also touched his face and nose and was having some burning there so he applied the rubbing alcohol to that area too! Another success.
Now, please note that Hubby washed his hands thoroughly after cutting the jalapeno peppers! So when you read these warnings about wearing gloves when cutting hot peppers...you might want to listen.
While this incident provided us with some fun entertainment for the evening (well, maybe I was the only one entertained) it is not something I suggest you try at home.